Civility Zombies

Cartoon by Barry

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Gretchen Koch and I were chatting on Twitter, about if I should do a cartoon about the “civility” issue. Gretchen said “I think it’s worth it, because as you said, it’s perennial. The civility zombie, that is.” This comic strip immediately popped into my mind, and fortunately for me, Gretchen said she didn’t mind if I used the idea. Thanks, Gretchen!

Also, thanks to Mandolin for suggesting the kicker panel!

Drawing cute cartoon zombies is, as it turns out, a great deal of fun.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

This is a four-panel cartoon.

PANEL 1

Two women, one with a ponytail, one with glasses, are in a house, near an open window. The woman with glasses looks angry and is holding a cell phone; the woman with the ponytail is reacting with panic.

GLASSES: Have you read the news? $@@! the GOP!
PONYTAIL: Shh! Don’t say that!
DISTANT VOICE FROM OUTSIDE WINDOW: Civility.
(Note: Here and throughout the cartoon, the word “civility” is lettered in fonts designed to look like dripping blood.)

PANEL 2

Zombies appear in the window, looking like they might crawl into the house. They have rotting green flesh and each of them is raising a forefinger and waggling it.

GLASSES: What’s happening?
PONYTAIL: It’s the civility zombies! They come whenever someone on the left is impolite! RUN!
ZOMBIES: Civility! Civility…

PANEL 3

Glasses and Ponytail flee up a hillside, pursued by zombies. A zombie in the foreground look sstraight at the viewer.

GLASSES: Can we shoot them?
PONYTAIL: That’s rude, which only makes them stronger! Plus, we’re liberals! We don’t have guns!
ZOMBIES: Civility! Civility! Civility!

PANEL 4

Glasses and Ponytail have come to a stop, surrounded by zombies. Glasses looks frightened; Ponytail looks irritated.

ZOMBIES: Civility! Civility!
GLASSES: So this is it? We’re going to die?
PONYTAIL: No, they’re completely toothless. But so annoying!

SMALL KICKER PANEL BELOW BOTTOM OF STRIP

A man in a “MAGA” hat is grinning and talking at a zombie. The zombie has his back to the MAGA hat wearer, and makes a dismissive gesture with his hand.

MAGA: Libtards! Cucks! Snowflakes!
ZOMBIE (in blood-dripping lettering): Meh.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Media criticism |

Top Ten Reasons We Take Kids From Their Parents At The Border

Cartoon by Barry

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Here’s a list of organizations that are mobilizing to help separated immigrant children | The Texas Tribune

Transcript of cartoon:

This cartoon has a title panel followed by ten panels.

TITLE PANEL
CAPTION: Top Ten Reasons We Take Kids From Their Parents At The Border

Below the title, a caricature of Jeff Sessions is speaking to the viewer, smiling.
SESSIONS: Refugees are fleeing despots and murderers! So to deter refugees, we have to be even worse!

PANEL 1

A cheerful man in an ICE uniform speaks directly to the viewer. Behind him is a cage filled with wide-eyed children.
MAN: How else can we test our awesome child-holding cages?

PANEL 2
A well-off (or at least, middle class) looking couple sits at a table; the man looks down, ashamed, while the woman talks with wide-eyed sincerity at the viewer.
MAN: Because I’m tired of caring about what happens to other people.
WOMAN: It’s exhausting.

PANEL 3
A hand holds a smartphone. On the phone, a video on Youtube or some similar site is playing, showing a young man wearing a hoodie sitting in his car and talking to the camera. He’s grinning hugely.
MAN: Because it’s worth it to see the snowflakes cry!

PANEL 4
A middle-aged man in an ICE uniform, with a big cop mustache, holds an adorable smiling baby towards the viewers. The baby is wearing footie pajamas with a pattern of little hearts. The man is yelling angrily.
MAN: Because this is the face of a TERRORIST!

PANEL 5
A man in a hoodie is curled up in the corner of an empty room; he’s very small. He’s hugging himself with one arm while sweating with fear. His word balloon and lettering are shaky.
MAN: Brown illegals are coming to steal my way of life.

PANEL 6
A woman wearing sunglasses and a MAGA hat speaks directly to the viewers, looking stern, calm, and collected. Behind her is a fence with barbed wire on top; on the other side of the fence are people in silhouette.
WOMAN: This is what making America great looks like.

PANEL 7
An ICE agent speaks cheerfully to the viewers, while he’s holding a woman in a very painful looking headlock.
ICE AGENT: Because we can do anything we like to illegals! It’s not like they’re people.

PANEL 8
We are looking at a wall of an institutional looking building made of concrete blocks. A sign on the building says “Detention Facility.” A door into the building has a window embedded in it. Through the window, we can see the face of an angry looking man, talking to us.
MAN: Because we’re throwing the kids a big party! With clowns! And balloons! No, you CAN’T see!

PANEL 9
A person wearing a KKK outfit, white hood and all, stands in front of a barbed wire fence. Dark stormclouds can be seen behind the KKK member.
KKK: Isn’t it obvious?

PANEL 10
Uncle Sam, wearing the top hat and also a Hawaiian shirt with flowers all over it, sneers at the viewer as he gives the viewer the finger.
UNCLE SAM: Because fuck you! THAT’S why.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists, Social Justice |

The Boy Who Cried Collapse!

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please help me make more! I couldn’t do these cartoons without the support I get from my patreon. A $1 pledge means a lot to me.

Transcript of Cartoon

This comic has four panels.

Panel 1

CAPTION: 1965

The panel shows an academic dude, who looks very well put together, standing on a college campus. He’s smoking a pipe and wearing a snazzy suit with a bow tie. He looks very confident.

DUDE: If government doesn’t outlaw birth control, society will collapse.

Panel 2

CAPTION: 2000

The same dude, but 35 years older; his hair is no longer fully black. He’s wearing a jacket and tie, and looks very stern, holding up a finger to make his point. The camera is a little tighter on him now, but it’s not a tight shot.

DUDE: If we can’t throw people in prison for gay sex… Society will DEFINITELY collapse!

Panel 3

CAPTION: 2008

The panel shows the same man, in a tighter shot. He looks older now, and his hair, while thick, has no black left in it. He looks a little wide-eyed and panicked, and his body language looks more desperate. His word balloon is a little shaky.

DUDE: If gays can marry… SOCIETY WILL COLLAPSE!

Panel 4

CAPTION: TODAY

The same dude, now in a close-up. He looks older; his hair is white and thinned, and he has visible wrinkles. He is leaning on a cane with one hand, and the other hand is in a fist shaking impotently up and down. He is sweating and wide-eyed and fully panicked.

DUDE: If trans people get equal rights… SOCIETY WILL COLLAPSE FOR REALSIES! Any day now! This time for SURE!

Tiny “kicker” panel below the bottom of the strip

The cartoonist, Barry, is talking to the academic dude.

BARRY: Ever heard of the boy who cried wolf?
DUDE: No, but I hope he’s not gay.

Posted in History, LGBT cartoons |

Witch Hunt

Cartoon by Barry

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TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON
This cartoon has four panels.

Panel 1
This panel shows two women hanging from chains on a dungeon wall. Both women look dirty and are wearing ragged clothes. One is blonde, one brunette. They are looking at each other and chatting.

BLONDE: So, Merga… How have you been?
MERGA: Oh, you know…

Panel 2
A close-up of Merga. She looks like she may be in shock.

MERGA: Yesterday my neighbor said he dreamed that I danced with the devil. Today, they tortured me for hours until I “confessed” just to make it stop.

Panel 3
A shot of the two of them, looking very downcast.
MERGA: And tomorrow, they’ll burn me to death at the stake. How have you been?
BLONDE: Same.

Panel 4
This panel shows a smartphone, being held in someone’s hand. On the smartphone screen, an angry middle-aged man wearing a suit and necktie is speaking.

CAPTION: 400 years later.

NECKTIE: Someone on the internet criticized J.K. Rowling using hyperbolic language. It’s a WITCH HUNT!

Tiny kicker panel below bottom of strip.
The necktie dude from the fourth panel is talking to Barry (the cartoonist).
NECKTIE: You’re right, it’s not a witch hunt. It’s a lynch mob!

Posted in Conservatives, LGBT cartoons, Sexism & Misogyny |

I Voted For Obama!

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support my Patreon. A $1 pledge matters a lot to me.

Transcript of Cartoon

The cartoon has four panels.1

Panel 1

CAPTION: 2008
The image shows a white woman, looking very pleased, stepping out of a voting booth.
WOMAN: It is done! I, a white person, have voted for Barack Obama!

Panel 2

The woman is surprised by Barack Obama being there. Obama is dressed in his standard dark suit, and looks cheerful.
WOMAN: Gasp! Barack Obama!
OBAMA: Hi, Judy! Thanks for your vote!

Panel 3

A close up on Obama holding up a piece of paper which says “certificate” in large letters at the top. Behind Obama, the voting station has disappeared, and fireworks fill the air.

OBAMA: As the duly-elected spokesman of all Black people, let me present this certificate signifying that nothing you say or do is ever racist!

Panel 4

A new scene shows the same woman, now in a different outfit, talking to three skeptical-looking Black folks.

WOMAN: And then Michelle Obama came out, and she said…

Posted in Elections, Racism & Racists |

But she never said “no”!

Cartoon by Barry

This stip was created with Becky Hawkins, who is also my collaborator on SuperButch! Becky drew this comic, while I wrote, lettered, and added the colors.

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support them on Patreon! A $1 pledge really matters to me.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

The title image of this cartoon has the words “But she never said ‘NO’ in large white letters that fade into the background. Below the title is a drawing of telephone wires, with two birds sitting on a wire.
FIRST BIRD: Does this comic strip need a content warning?
SECOND BIRD: I think the title covers it.

PANEL 1

A woman and a man are on a sofa. The man is leaning towards her, putting his lips near hers, while she pulls back and puts a protective hand, in a “stop” gesture, in front of her mouth.

WOMAN: I’m not sure I want to do this right now…
MAN (thought): That’s not literally saying “no.”

PANEL 2
A closer shot of him from over the woman’s shoulder. He is smiling. She’s still holding up a “stop” hand. His thought balloon partly obscures her speech balloon, but not so much that we can’t read what she’s saying.

WOMAN: Hey c’mon, this isn’t a good idea.
MAN (thought): That’s not a literal “no.” So it’s okay to grab her boobs.

PANEL 3
A closer shot of him leaning in to kiss her as she pulls away. She’s saying something, but we can’t read it because his thought balloon gets in the way.

MAN (thought): She still hasn’t literally said “no.” I’m good!

PANEL 4
A close-up of his face. The woman’s not in the panel, but her word balloon – still mostly obscured by his head and his thought balloon – indicates that she’s positioned below him. He looks like he’s concentrating.

MAN (thought): Pulling away while I’m trying to pull her pants down isn’t literally saying “no.”

PANEL 5
In silhouette, we see that she’s lying on her back, with him on top of her. She isn’t saying anything.

MAN (thought): Now she’s just being silent and unresponsive. No talking means she’s not saying “no!”

PANEL 6
This is the final panel. The setting has changed; the man is now holding his arms up and looking frustrated. A few people in silhouette are looking at him; their posture makes it seem like they’re angry at him.

MAN: How was I supposed to know? I’m not a mind-reader!

KICKER PANEL

A small panel below the bottom of the strip shows the man, now looking full of himself, talking to a different couple of people.

MAN: I do consider myself a feminist!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Becky Hawkins collaborations, Sexism & Misogyny |

How Long? aka Trump Card

Cartoon by Barry

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TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

There are four panels in this cartoon.

The first three panels show two women walking on a hillside, perhaps in a park. One woman is wearing a shirt with an exclamation mark design, the other is wearing glasses. They’re arguing.

PANEL 1

EXCLAMATION MARK: A lot of liberals are rigid and mean to people who disagree with them.
GLASSES: Conservatives elected Donald Trump president.

PANEL 2

EXCLAMATION MARK: Obamacare didn’t deliver nearly as much as liberals promised!
GLASSES: Yeah, but conservatives elected Trump!

PANEL 3
Exclamation Mark has turned her back on Glasses, crossing her arms and looking stubborn.

EXCLAMATION MARK: Oh, come on! How long are you going to hold that against us.

PANEL 4

We are in outer space; there’s a moon nearby, and a flying saucer and planet in the background. In the foreground, two brains in high-tech-looking jars (well, “high-tech” in a 1950s sci-fi movie prop sort of way), both with eyeballs, are floating in space. One of the brains is wearing a pair of glasses.

CAPTION: A million billion years later.
GLASSES: …but conservatives elected Trump!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Elections |

New Recruits’ Vow

Cartoon by Barry

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Transcript of Cartoon

This is a four-panel cartoon.

PANEL ONE shows two women, one wearing a long open-front sweater and a polka dot skirt, the other wearing pants and a long-sleeved v neck shirt. The woman with the polka dot skirt is reading aloud from something on her smartphone. The woman in the v-neck shirt is listening, hand on her chin.

DOTS: Listen to the vow this group makes new recruits take! “I swear I will have no mercy for brown people…”

PANEL TWO
A close-up of Dots as she continues reading from her phone. She looks a bit angry.

DOTS: “I will throw them into prison without due process. I will pull their crying children from their arms.”

PANEL THREE
A shot of the two of them. Dots continues to read from her phone. V-Neck interrupts, looking horrified, her eyes wide and her hands on her cheeks.

DOTS: “I will spread fear and desperation. I will…”
V-NECK: What nightmare group is this? The Klan? The Nazis?

PANEL FOUR
A middle-aged man with a mustache and wearing a suit, stands behind a podium, talking to a crowd of people. The front of the podium has the Department of Homeland Security seal, and the word “ICE.”

MAN: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to ICE!

Posted in Immigration, Social Justice |

Why Some Jobs Are Illegal

Cartoon by Barry

I couldn’t do all these cartoons without the support I get on Patreon. A $1 pledge really matters.

Sex work is, for me, in the same category as smoking pot or (until recently) not legally recognizing same-sex marriages, a category I’d describe as “there’s just no logical reason this should be illegal.”

This cartoon focuses on how little sense the arguments against legalization make. But the most important line, for me, is in panel 2: “Wouldn’t that make things worse for maids?” It seems clear that 1) no law will ever succeed in wiping out sex work, and 2) laws making sex work illegal inevitably hurt the sex workers themselves.

When the government outlaws something, it’s going to lead to people being hurt.

And sometimes it’s worth it. Lowering the speed limit to 20mph in a residential zone will harm some people. Some people will be made late, some people will have to pay speeding tickets, etc. But in exchange for that, we get a big gain – pedestrians hit by cars will have a much higher chance of surviving. The gain, in this case, seems worth the loss.

But outlawing selling sex makes it much more likely that sex workers will be assaulted, hurt, even killed, and makes it much harder for them to go to police for help. And the more marginalized a sex worker is (for instance, because of race, or because of being trans) the more endangered they are. This doesn’t seem to be a case where the gains justify the losses.

Artwise, this strip looks good to me, although I wish I had inked with bigger, meatier lines – the lines in this one look a bit too thin and controlled to my eyes. But that’s the sort of thing I notice a lot more than readers do, I think.

There are a bunch of things I think came out well. The clothing is better than usual for me this strip. The hardest thing to draw here was the maid’s cart, but I think it came out well (by which I mean, I think readers will immediately recognize what it is without having to think about it). And I think some of the body language looks good (especially the woman in the plaid shirt in panels 3 and 4).

Transcript of cartoon

Panel 1
In the foreground, a young woman with her head shaved on the sides and sunglasses is walking three dogs. In the background, standing on a grassy hillside, two women, one in a polo shirt, the other in a plaid shirt, are talking.
POLO: No one could want to be a dog-walker. It shouldn’t be legal.
PLAID: Some people like it.

Panel 2
In a hotel hallway, in the foreground, a maid pushes a cleaning cart. In the background, the same two women are talking.
POLO: Many maids are exploited or even trafficked. We should outlaw being a maid!
PLAID: Wouldn’t that make things worse for maids?

Panel 3
A hilly park again. In the foreground, a man with a knit cap and one of those orange “I work for the city” vests is picking up trash off the ground with a trash-picking stick. In the background, the same two women talk; Polo looks disgusted, and Plaid is facepalming.
POLO: Picking up trash for a living is gross. It shouldn’t be allowed.
PLAID: You’re being ridiculous.

Panel 4
In the final panel, we see only Polo and Plaid, talking to each other. Polo has a forefinger pointing up, making a point, and Plaid responds fervently, leaning forward and smacking her fist into the palm of her other hand.
POLO: And for the exact same reasons, we should outlaw prostitution!
PLAID: YES!

This cartoon on Patreon

Posted in Barry's favorites, Labor rights & Unions |

Is Marriage A Magic Wand?

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, please support them on my Patreon. A $1 pledge really matters.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

Panel 1
This panel shows a reporter standing in a back yard, taking notes in a little pad, as a woman in a lawn chair speaks to him.

WOMAN: Marriage wasn’t a magic wand that got me out of poverty. I worked really hard, and I lucked into a good job. I didn’t get married until after all that.

Panel 2
The same reporter, now standing in an academic office (we can tell it’s academic because there’s a bookcase in the background). A woman wearing glasses and holding up some papers is talking to him.

WOMAN 2: As a social scientist, I know marriage isn’t a magic wand. Evidence shows that what matters most is having a full-time job, and that’s not always under people’s control.

Panel 3
The same reporter is talking to a man wearing a suit and tie; they’re standing in front of an office building in a city.
MAN: At our think tank, we don’t have real-world experience, or the best evidence. But we do have a simple narrative that blames poverty on single mothers.

Panel 4
This panel only shows a newspaper’s front page. The newspaper, which is called “Daily Opiate,” has a big headline, a sub headline, and a photo of the man from panel 3, with a pull-quote next to the photo.
BIG HEADLINE: RESEARCH: MARRIAGE IS A MAGIC WAND!
SUB HEADLINE: SINGLE MOTHERS ARE POOR BECAUSE THEY’RE FLOOZIES!
PHOTO PULL-QUOTE: “It’s just common sense!”

Posted in Economic cartoons, Sexism & Misogyny |

Medicare For All Is Idealistic But Not Realistic

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, please support them on my Patreon. A $1 pledge really matters.

TRANSCRIPT

This cartoon has nine panels.

Panel 1
A woman in a business casual outfit – she’s a politician – is speaking directly to the viewer, looking cheerful. We’ll call her “Dem.”

DEM: “Medicare for all” is idealistic, but unrealistic. We Democrats need to compromise, because that’s how policy gets done.

Panel 2
The same woman, now looking serious, gestures towards a small table. On the table is a HUGE stack of paper.

DEM: Take the “Affordable Care Act.” It’s not everything Democrats wanted for health care.

Panel 3
The shot shows the woman, now partly hidden behind the huge stack of papers, continuing to speak.
DEM: We worked hard to get many players to the table. The ACA incorporates Republican ideas, insurance company ideas, doctors’ ideas…

Panel 4
The woman continues speaking cheerily.
DEM: And because the ACA has so many compromises, it’s something everyone can live with.

Panel 5
A balding man in a suit and tie, smiling and carrying a bomb with a lit fuse, walks into the panel. The woman gestures towards him without really looking at him, still looking cheery.
DEM: Because we compromised, in time our Republican colleagues will work with us to make the ACA better.

Panel 6
The man, still smiling, tosses the bomb at the huge stack of paper. The woman looks startled.

Panel 7
The panel shows a huge “BOOOM” sound effect.

Panel 8
The woman stands, eyes hugely wide, staring out at the viewer, while tiny bits of paper rain down around her. The balding man walks off the panel.

Panel 9
The woman talks directly to the viewer again. She looks messy, and there’s a hunk of paper in her hair, and her eyes are still huge, but she’s trying to smile again.
DEM: Um… As I was saying, “Medicare For All” is idealistic but not realistic.

Tiny Kicker Panel At Bottom Of Cartoon
Dem talks to a protester who is carrying a “Medicare For All” sign.
DEM: Why can’t you be realistic?
PROTESTOR: Look who’s talking!

Posted in Health care |

Farrakhan in the Nest

Cartoon by Barry

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For those of you unfamiliar with this story, this Atlantic article offers a recap. It’s a story that I felt I HAD to comment on. I expect this kind of behavior from the right, but not from allies.

Transcript of Cartoon

Panel 1
Two anthropomorphic birds are standing and chatting in a nest. They have human bodies (and clothes) but bird heads. A third bird, wearing a suit with a bow tie and rectangular glasses, flies in from the right side; this bird, we will find out, is named Louis.
BIRD 1: This is our nest! I hope you find it welcoming.
BIRD 2: It looks great! I’m really–
LOUIS: JEWS!

Panel 2
BIRD 1: Have you met my pal Louis? He’s such a great bird.
BIRD 2: Uh…
LOUIS: Jews are the mother and father of apartheid!

Panel 3
BIRD 1: I don’t agree with everything Louis says, but…
BIRD 2: I’m Jewish and queer. I’m really not comfortable in this nest.
LOUIS: The wicked Jews promote filth lebsianism and homosexuality!

Panel 4
Bird 2 is flying away from the nest as she speaks.
BIRD 1: But you’re safe and welcome in this nest. We oppose ALL bigotry.
LOUIS: Degenerate Hollywood Jews are turning men into women and women into men!
BIRD 2: Jewbird OUT! Bye!

Posted in LGBT cartoons |

Politicizing Tragedy

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support my Patreon! A $1 pledge really matters.

TRANSCRIPT

PANEL 1
A man and a woman stand in a field. From off-panel, there is the sound of gunfire – “Bang! Bang! Bang!”
WOMAN: Oh God. There’s another mass shooting! We need gun control laws!
MAN: You ghoul! Stop politicizing tragedy!

PANEL 2
The man pontificates, fingertips of one hand on his breast, the other hand pointing off into the distance.
MAN: We have to wait a respectful amount of time…

PANEL 3
The woman’s arms are akimbo, looking impatient. The man holds up one hand in a “wait” gesture, while looking at a watch on his other wrist.
WOMAN: Okay, NOW can we talk about gun control?
MAN: Just a moment….
MAN (small print to indicate something mumbled to himself): C’mon, c’mon…

PANEL 4
The woman jumps, suprrised by a new round of gunfire from off panel. BANG! BANG! BANG! The man speaks, looking very self-satisfied.
MAN: What a shame. Looks like we can’t discuss it now, either.

KICKER PANEL AT BOTTOM:
MAN: I’m not the one who makes up the rules.
WOMAN: Yes you are!

Posted in Uncategorized |

Liberal Pundit Speaks Out Against Identity Politics

Cartoon by Barry

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A $1 pledge really matters!

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

PANEL 1

A white man sits behind the desk of a spacious office. He has a laptop open in front of him and books on either side of him; behind him are windows facing some trees, and some flowers in a vase. He’s wearing glasses and a button up shirt without a tie.
MAN: I have a message for all the identity politics liberals!
As long as idenitty politics exist, Democrats can’t win elections. And if we cna’t win elections, then we can’t make the changes you want.

PANEL 2

A closer shot of the man, as he drinks from his cofee cup.
MAN: Take Black Lives Matter. That alienates working class whites. So just be quiet about it.
Just like trans activists, and feminists, and student protestors… you people are why Trump is president!

PANEL 3

The man raises one finger as he pontificates.
MAN: The only way to get elected is to say nothing that could alienate white Trump voters.
Trump voters will flock to Democrats if liberals just quit mentioning Blacks or gays or trans or women or any other identity politics CRAP!

PANEL 4

The man leans back in his desk chair, one foot on the other knee, his hands behind his head, smiling.
MAN: But don’t worry! Once the Democrats are elected, we’ll be in power, and then… you people should continue shutting up.
Because we’ve got to get re-elected, right?

KICKER PANEL

A tiny panel below the bottom of the strip shows the man smiling, one hand placed on his chest in a “I’m good at this but also modest” sort of gesture.
MAN: I’m just saying we have to look at things objectively! And white men like me are ACES at objhectivity!

Posted in Elections, Media criticism |

Too Much Foam

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support my Patreon!

Panel one shows a woman in a polka-dot dress sitting in a coffee shop, glaring down at her cappuccino.

WOMAN (thought): Aw, darn it. They put too much foam on my cappuccino!

Panel 2 shows a bald man in the foreground, sitting at a different table, reading something on his smartphone. He is sitting on a power chair, and he has no right arm. There’s a cappuccino in front of him. In the background, we can see the woman from panel one, staring at the bald man with a shocked expression.

WOMAN (thought): Oh wow – that guy has no legs and only one arm! How does he even get out of bed in the morning?

Panel 3 shows the woman, head in hands, looking aghast.

WOMAN (thought): He has to psend every minute of his life figuring out how to manage with just one arm… and I’m thinking about foam! I SUCK!

Panel 4 shows the bald man again. He has picked up his cappuccino and is looking annoyed.

MAN (thought): They put too much foam on my cappuccino!

Posted in Ableism, Barry's favorites |

Cartoon: Wealthfare vs Welfare

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support my Patreon! A $1 pledge really matters.

Another collaboration with Rachel Swirsky!

A special thanks on the sidebar to patron N.K. Jemisin, who – among many other accomplishments – recently won the Hugo Award for “best novel” two years running. Rachel and I are both big fans of N.K.’s novels, and you should check out her website.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

At the top of the cartoon, in large letters, is the title “WELFARE vs WEALTHFARE.”

Below that, the cartoon is divided into three columns. The columns on the left and right show regular cartoon images; the middle column only contains a caption for each row. The left column is underneath the word “Welfare” in the title; the right-hand column is underneath the word “Wealthfare” in the title.

ROW 1: HANDOUTS

Welfare Panel: A man holding a grocery bag is startled by an angry man in a necktie yelling at him.
NECKTIE MAN: Let me see those groceries! You better not have spent your food stamps on anything nice!

Wealthfare Panel: A well-off looking man in a jacket and tie stands looking aloof, with his arms crossed and his nose up in the air. Behind him, a man wearing a tie is kneeling on the ground and begging.
KNEELING MAN: PLEEEEASE let us buy you a new stadium! We’ll give you $200 million dollars!

ROW 2: HOUSING

Welfare Panel: A woman stands at a pay phone, the phone held to her ear. She has luggage with her, and an anxious looking ten year old son.
VOICE FROM PHONE: Sure, we can help with housing. Looks like we’ll have space for you in… Four years.

Wealthfare Panel: A wealthy-looking older couple, wearing sunglasses and casual-nice clothes, stands in front of an enormous yacht.
WOMAN: We legally declared our million-dollar yacht our second home.
MAN: So now we deduct its mortgage from our taxes!

ROW 3: CRIME AND PUNISHMENT

Welfare Panel: A building with a sign, which says “welfare office.” Voices come from inside the building.
FIRST VOICE: Pee into this cup.
SECOND VOICE: But I don’t use drugs!
FIRST VOICE: Exactly what a druggie would say!

Wealthfare Panel: A wealthy looking businessman sits in a large executive chair, reading some papers. Behind him, two younger, slightly nerdy looking people talk to his back, looking anxious.
NERD 1: Look at all these crimes! I’m sorry, but you’ll have to pay a modest fine.
NERD 2: But you can deduct it from your taxes!
BUSINESSMAN (unconcerned, barely paying attention): Uh-huh.

ROW 4: BANKRUPTCY

Welfare Panel: A security guard in a brown uniform lounges in front of a house, leaning on a sign that says “For Sale By Bank.” A father holding an infant, and his young daughter at his side, look aghast.
GUARD: The bank says “thanks for the swell house!”

Wealthfare Panel: Another businessman, seated behyind an enormous desk; the desktop is mostly empty, although he does have a laptop and a desk calendar. Behind him is a big window with a cityscape view.
BUSINESSMAN: Hello, government? I gambled away billions of my bank’s assets. Give me my bailout in thousand dollar bills.

ROW 5:THE BOTTOM LINE

Welfare Panel: Uncle Sam has his back turned towards a mother carrying an infant. His expression shows contempt. He holds out a tiny check to her like it’s a dead fish. A line from the check points to a little ¢ symbol.
UNCLE SAM: Take your welfare, MOOCHER.

Wealthfare Panel: A smiling wealthy man looks on as a smiling Uncle Sam brings in a wheelbarrow overflowing with piles and bags of cash.
UNCLE SAM: Here’s this month’s delivery, sir!

Kicker panel at bottom of strip
We see the necktie man and the food stamps user from the first panel. The necktie man is yelling again.
NECKTIE MAN: You have a refrigerator AND a cell phone? What are you, Beyonce?

Posted in Economic cartoons, Rachel Swirsky collaborations, Social Justice |

Radfem Clubhouse

Cartoon by Barry

You can read lots more cartoons, for free, here. Or click here to see a bunch of lgbt themed cartoons.

PANEL 1
This cartoon is colored mostly in a desaturated orange, except for dark orange shading and white highlights.
On a woody hillside, a light-haired woman in a black tank top and a skirt stands in a crude treehouse, which is nestled in the crook of a tree, ten feet or so above the ground. Slats are nailed to the tree trunk to form a crude ladder up to the treehouse. The light-haired woman is talking to a black-haired woman wearing glasses, who is standing on the ground looking up at the treehouse.

GLASSES WOMAN: I want to join your radical feminist club! But only if it has no Jews.
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: What? NO! That’s NOT what our radfem club is about.

PANEL 2
GLASSES WOMAN: To be radical feminists, we must put WHITE feminists first and sideline feminists of color.
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: No, NO! WE might DO that, but never EVER say so aloud!

Panel 3
GLASSES WOMAN: As radical feminists, it’s our duty to align with the Christian right to oppose lesbian and gay rights!
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: STOP this! Our radical feminist club does NOT stand for bigotry!

Panel 4
In contrast to her stern, angry expressions in the first three panels, the treehouse woman is now smiling broadly, opening her arms in welcome.

GLASSES WOMAN: TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN!
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: Except for that bigotry. Welcome to our club!

Small kicker panel at the bottom of the strip:
A new character, a woman with short hair, talks to the treehouse woman. The treehouse woman yells back at her.
SHORT HAIRED WOMAN: Lots of key radical feminists are pro-trans! Look at Andrea Dworkin.
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: Dworkin was a FAKE feminist!

Posted in LGBT cartoons |

The Puerto Rico Loop

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these comics, please support them on Patreon. A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon.

The main body of this cartoon shows three groupings of figures. Large arrows point counterclockwise from each group to the next group.

At the top of the loop, a balding man in an expensive suit speaks directly to the readers, while shrugging.
SUIT DUDE: We can’t put tax dollars into helping Puerto Rico if the voters don’t care about it.

A big arrow leads from the man in the suit, to a television set, showing two news anchors, a man and a woman. They are both shrugging and looking into the camera. The anchorwoman speaks.

ANCHORWOMAN: If the government does nothing about Puerto Rico, there’s nothing for us to report.

A large arrow leads from the television set to a man and a woman standing on a hillside. The man is wearing a plaid shirt and scratching his head in bewilderment; the woman, wearing a hoodie and a skirt with a dotted pattern, looks directly at the reader and speaks while shrugging.

WOMAN: If it’s constantly on the news, we forget it exists.

A large arrow leads from the two people, back up to the politician in a suit.

At the very bottom of the cartoon, a small “kicker” panel shows a fat man with a beard and glasses speaking directly to the readers.
BARRY: There’s no way to break out of this cycle! …Unless the victims are white.

Posted in Media criticism, Racism & Racists |

The Life of MLK Jr (as told by white people)

Cartoon by Barry

This cartoon was posted today on The Nib.

If you enjoy my cartoons, and can spare it, please support them on Patreon! A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon:

PANEL 1
A Black woman sits in an armchair, holding a little baby. The baby is crying.
CAPTION: MLK Jr was born.

PANEL 2
A young Black boy sits up in bed, in a dark bedroom, clutching his blanket.
CAPTION: Then he had a dream.
BOY: I had a dream that someday our children would be judged by the content of their character, not the color of their skin! So stop playing the race card!
OFF-PANEL VOICE: Martin, go to sleep!

PANEL 3
Panel three shows a graveyard, The gravestone in the foregound has, carved on it, “Martin Luther King Junior. “Stop Playing The Race Card.”
CAPTION: And he NEVER said or did anything else EVER. And then he died. The end!

CAPTION AT BOTTOM OF STRIP: THE LIFE OF MLK JR (AS TOLD BY WHITE PEOPLE)

The Life of MLK Jr (as told by white people) | Barry Deutsch on Patreon

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists |

Our (Shit)Whole Immigration Policy

Cartoon by Barry

This cartoon was first published on Spliter .

If you enjoy these cartoons, and you can spare it, please support my Patreon! A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon:

Panel 1
A middle-aged or older man, handsome in a grandfatherly way, stands behind a podium wearing a brown suit. He looks stern and serious, and raises his left index finger into the air as he speaks.

MAN: Republican Immigration policy is NOT racist! “American first” is not racist! “Merit-based” is not racist!

Panel 2
A close-up of the man, who is now smiling genially, and shrugging.
MAN: The Republican policy isn’t about anything but MERIT! We want immigrants who can contribute to our society and grow our economy! Judging people as individuals is NOT racist!

Panel 3
Final panel. The man makes a fist and is now scowling angrily.
MAN: Oh, and we don’t want anyone from Africa, Haiti or any of those SHITHOLE countires. That’s it. Bye now!

Posted in Immigration, Racism & Racists |