The Post Office Is Dying!
October 27th, 2020 Barry Posted in Uncategorized | No Comments »
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TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON
This cartoon has four panels. Each panel shows the same two characters: A businessman-looking character in a pinstripe suit, and an anthropomorphic blue mailbox – one of the big metal ones, found on street corners, that you can drop your mail into for postal workers to pick up. The recessed slot where mail is inserted is drawn to be the mailbox’s mouth, and it lifts one of its four legs to gesture with it like a human making a hand gesture.
All four panels take place in the same location, a sidewalk in a city or town. There’s some litter and pebbles scattered across the sidewalk, and also some fallen leaves from a tree. Across the street we can see another sidewalk and a building; a sign on the corner of the building says “back ground detail.”
PANEL 1
Pinstripes walks into the panel, holding his hand out towards Mailbox. Mailbox is grinning and gesturing towards itself.
PINSTRIPES: Post Office! I heard you’re nearly dead!
MAILBOX: No, no! I’ve had my ups and downs, adjusting to the digital age, but I’m still here! Honestly, I can last for decades! Or forever!
PANEL 2
Pinstripes rubs a hand over his chin thoughtfully. Mailbox leans back and laughs.
PINSTRIPES: What if I pass a law weighing you down by making you pay retiree health care costs over fifty years in advance?
MAILBOX: Ha-ha! That would be ridiculous! No corporation or public agency has ever been required to-
PANEL 3
A gigantic, heavy sack – bigger than either character – drops out of the sky, slamming Mailbox to the ground with a big “WHAM!” sound effect. Maibox is literally crushed under the weight, although its “head” is in the clear. Mailbox’s mouth is open in an expression of surprise and pain, and several envelopes come shooting out of its mouth. Meanwhile, Pinstripes watches with arms folded, looking satisfied.
PANEL 4
Smirking, Pinstripes puts a hand by his mouth to shout out, the other hand pointing at Mailbox on the ground. Mailbox, still trapped under the enormous weight, looks stunned.
PINSTRIPES: On no! The Post Office is dying! Now we have to privatize it!