Cartoon: Wealthfare vs Welfare

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support my Patreon! A $1 pledge really matters.

Another collaboration with Rachel Swirsky!

A special thanks on the sidebar to patron N.K. Jemisin, who – among many other accomplishments – recently won the Hugo Award for “best novel” two years running. Rachel and I are both big fans of N.K.’s novels, and you should check out her website.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

At the top of the cartoon, in large letters, is the title “WELFARE vs WEALTHFARE.”

Below that, the cartoon is divided into three columns. The columns on the left and right show regular cartoon images; the middle column only contains a caption for each row. The left column is underneath the word “Welfare” in the title; the right-hand column is underneath the word “Wealthfare” in the title.

ROW 1: HANDOUTS

Welfare Panel: A man holding a grocery bag is startled by an angry man in a necktie yelling at him.
NECKTIE MAN: Let me see those groceries! You better not have spent your food stamps on anything nice!

Wealthfare Panel: A well-off looking man in a jacket and tie stands looking aloof, with his arms crossed and his nose up in the air. Behind him, a man wearing a tie is kneeling on the ground and begging.
KNEELING MAN: PLEEEEASE let us buy you a new stadium! We’ll give you $200 million dollars!

ROW 2: HOUSING

Welfare Panel: A woman stands at a pay phone, the phone held to her ear. She has luggage with her, and an anxious looking ten year old son.
VOICE FROM PHONE: Sure, we can help with housing. Looks like we’ll have space for you in… Four years.

Wealthfare Panel: A wealthy-looking older couple, wearing sunglasses and casual-nice clothes, stands in front of an enormous yacht.
WOMAN: We legally declared our million-dollar yacht our second home.
MAN: So now we deduct its mortgage from our taxes!

ROW 3: CRIME AND PUNISHMENT

Welfare Panel: A building with a sign, which says “welfare office.” Voices come from inside the building.
FIRST VOICE: Pee into this cup.
SECOND VOICE: But I don’t use drugs!
FIRST VOICE: Exactly what a druggie would say!

Wealthfare Panel: A wealthy looking businessman sits in a large executive chair, reading some papers. Behind him, two younger, slightly nerdy looking people talk to his back, looking anxious.
NERD 1: Look at all these crimes! I’m sorry, but you’ll have to pay a modest fine.
NERD 2: But you can deduct it from your taxes!
BUSINESSMAN (unconcerned, barely paying attention): Uh-huh.

ROW 4: BANKRUPTCY

Welfare Panel: A security guard in a brown uniform lounges in front of a house, leaning on a sign that says “For Sale By Bank.” A father holding an infant, and his young daughter at his side, look aghast.
GUARD: The bank says “thanks for the swell house!”

Wealthfare Panel: Another businessman, seated behyind an enormous desk; the desktop is mostly empty, although he does have a laptop and a desk calendar. Behind him is a big window with a cityscape view.
BUSINESSMAN: Hello, government? I gambled away billions of my bank’s assets. Give me my bailout in thousand dollar bills.

ROW 5:THE BOTTOM LINE

Welfare Panel: Uncle Sam has his back turned towards a mother carrying an infant. His expression shows contempt. He holds out a tiny check to her like it’s a dead fish. A line from the check points to a little ¢ symbol.
UNCLE SAM: Take your welfare, MOOCHER.

Wealthfare Panel: A smiling wealthy man looks on as a smiling Uncle Sam brings in a wheelbarrow overflowing with piles and bags of cash.
UNCLE SAM: Here’s this month’s delivery, sir!

Kicker panel at bottom of strip
We see the necktie man and the food stamps user from the first panel. The necktie man is yelling again.
NECKTIE MAN: You have a refrigerator AND a cell phone? What are you, Beyonce?

Posted in Economic cartoons, Rachel Swirsky collaborations, Social Justice |

Radfem Clubhouse

Cartoon by Barry

You can read lots more cartoons, for free, here. Or click here to see a bunch of lgbt themed cartoons.

PANEL 1
This cartoon is colored mostly in a desaturated orange, except for dark orange shading and white highlights.
On a woody hillside, a light-haired woman in a black tank top and a skirt stands in a crude treehouse, which is nestled in the crook of a tree, ten feet or so above the ground. Slats are nailed to the tree trunk to form a crude ladder up to the treehouse. The light-haired woman is talking to a black-haired woman wearing glasses, who is standing on the ground looking up at the treehouse.

GLASSES WOMAN: I want to join your radical feminist club! But only if it has no Jews.
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: What? NO! That’s NOT what our radfem club is about.

PANEL 2
GLASSES WOMAN: To be radical feminists, we must put WHITE feminists first and sideline feminists of color.
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: No, NO! WE might DO that, but never EVER say so aloud!

Panel 3
GLASSES WOMAN: As radical feminists, it’s our duty to align with the Christian right to oppose lesbian and gay rights!
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: STOP this! Our radical feminist club does NOT stand for bigotry!

Panel 4
In contrast to her stern, angry expressions in the first three panels, the treehouse woman is now smiling broadly, opening her arms in welcome.

GLASSES WOMAN: TRANS WOMEN ARE MEN!
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: Except for that bigotry. Welcome to our club!

Small kicker panel at the bottom of the strip:
A new character, a woman with short hair, talks to the treehouse woman. The treehouse woman yells back at her.
SHORT HAIRED WOMAN: Lots of key radical feminists are pro-trans! Look at Andrea Dworkin.
TREEHOUSE WOMAN: Dworkin was a FAKE feminist!

Posted in LGBT cartoons |

The Puerto Rico Loop

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these comics, please support them on Patreon. A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon.

The main body of this cartoon shows three groupings of figures. Large arrows point counterclockwise from each group to the next group.

At the top of the loop, a balding man in an expensive suit speaks directly to the readers, while shrugging.
SUIT DUDE: We can’t put tax dollars into helping Puerto Rico if the voters don’t care about it.

A big arrow leads from the man in the suit, to a television set, showing two news anchors, a man and a woman. They are both shrugging and looking into the camera. The anchorwoman speaks.

ANCHORWOMAN: If the government does nothing about Puerto Rico, there’s nothing for us to report.

A large arrow leads from the television set to a man and a woman standing on a hillside. The man is wearing a plaid shirt and scratching his head in bewilderment; the woman, wearing a hoodie and a skirt with a dotted pattern, looks directly at the reader and speaks while shrugging.

WOMAN: If it’s constantly on the news, we forget it exists.

A large arrow leads from the two people, back up to the politician in a suit.

At the very bottom of the cartoon, a small “kicker” panel shows a fat man with a beard and glasses speaking directly to the readers.
BARRY: There’s no way to break out of this cycle! …Unless the victims are white.

Posted in Cycle cartoons, Media criticism, Racism & Racists |

The Life of MLK Jr (as told by white people)

Cartoon by Barry

This cartoon was posted today on The Nib.

If you enjoy my cartoons, and can spare it, please support them on Patreon! A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon:

PANEL 1
A Black woman sits in an armchair, holding a little baby. The baby is crying.
CAPTION: MLK Jr was born.

PANEL 2
A young Black boy sits up in bed, in a dark bedroom, clutching his blanket.
CAPTION: Then he had a dream.
BOY: I had a dream that someday our children would be judged by the content of their character, not the color of their skin! So stop playing the race card!
OFF-PANEL VOICE: Martin, go to sleep!

PANEL 3
Panel three shows a graveyard, The gravestone in the foregound has, carved on it, “Martin Luther King Junior. “Stop Playing The Race Card.”
CAPTION: And he NEVER said or did anything else EVER. And then he died. The end!

CAPTION AT BOTTOM OF STRIP: THE LIFE OF MLK JR (AS TOLD BY WHITE PEOPLE)

The Life of MLK Jr (as told by white people) | Barry Deutsch on Patreon

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists |

Our (Shit)Whole Immigration Policy

Cartoon by Barry

This cartoon was first published on Spliter .

If you enjoy these cartoons, and you can spare it, please support my Patreon! A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon:

Panel 1
A middle-aged or older man, handsome in a grandfatherly way, stands behind a podium wearing a brown suit. He looks stern and serious, and raises his left index finger into the air as he speaks.

MAN: Republican Immigration policy is NOT racist! “American first” is not racist! “Merit-based” is not racist!

Panel 2
A close-up of the man, who is now smiling genially, and shrugging.
MAN: The Republican policy isn’t about anything but MERIT! We want immigrants who can contribute to our society and grow our economy! Judging people as individuals is NOT racist!

Panel 3
Final panel. The man makes a fist and is now scowling angrily.
MAN: Oh, and we don’t want anyone from Africa, Haiti or any of those SHITHOLE countires. That’s it. Bye now!

Posted in Immigration, Racism & Racists |

White Lies (a sequel)

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support them at Patreon. A $1 pledge means a lot.

This cartoon is actually a sequel, to this other cartoon I did at least a decade ago. It’s interesting (to me, at least) seeing how my style has changed over the years.

Transcript of Cartoon

TITLE PANEL
Fractured-looking letters say “White Lies.” Next to the lettering, a smiling white lady speaks directly to the viewer.
LADY: I don’t even see race!

PANEL 1
A smiling white man explains himself.
MAN: I was only being FUNNY! I mean, “ironic.”

PANEL 2
A white man stands holding a black woman in front of him. To his left, a white woman stands, hugging a little Asian boy, and holding an Asian baby with her other arm. The boy has an image of Captain America’s iconic shield on his t-shirt.
WHITE MAN: I have a Black wife!
WHITE WOMAN: I adopted Asian kids!
BOTH TOGETHER: So nothing we say could possibly be racist!

PANEL 3
A young white man types at a laptop, his coffee cop besides him. Above him, we can see what he’s typing – a social media comment, with “his” picture, showing a pretty Black woman, besides the comment.
He is typing: As a strong Black woman, I think we Blacks talk too much about racism.

PANEL 4
An angry white woman, standing near a fence with some giant sunflowers nearby, talks directly to the viewer.
WOMANL Only monsters are racist! So criticizing me for racism is calling me a monster! How dare you call me a monster? So uncivil!

PANEL 5
A young white woman, stands in a coffee shop, holding a cup of tea and a saucer.
WOMAN: I DEFINITELY have a non-white friend who agrees with me.

PANEL 6
A white woman in slacks and a polo shirt sits on a park bench, reading a newspaper (“Daily Opiate”) and speaking cheerfully to the viewer.
WOMAN: My vote for Trump had nothing to do with racism!

PANEL 7
An older white man, with a friendly demeanor, a big white beard, and a sweater vest, speaks to the viewer.
MAN: I can’t be a racist, because I voted for Obama.

PANEL 8
Two white people stand talking directly to the viewer: A man with a checkerboard shirt, and a woman wearing a sleeveless black shirt. The man, spreading his arms wide, has a angry expression; the woman is holding up one finger like a professor making a point.
MAN: When non-whites get ANGRY discussing racism, that proves they’re irrational!
WOMAN: And when whites speak calmly, that proves our opinions are super rational!

PANEL 9
A white woman stands on a golf course, holding a golf club across one shoulder. She looks anxious.
WOMAN: If “Black Lives Matter,” that means white lives don’t matter!

PANEL 10
An angry white man is yelling and pointing at a Black woman.
MAN: The word “racism” is unfair because it shuts white people up!
WOMAN (thought): If only…

KICKER PANEL
In a small panel below the bottom of the comic strip, an angry white woman speaks directly to the viewers.
WOMAN: This cartoon generalizes about white people! That makes IT the REAL racist!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists |

Toxic Masculinity Stew

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy my cartoons, and can spare it, please support my patreon! A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon

At the top of the strip, there’s a drawing of various unidentifiable shapes floating in a liquid in a pot. Lettering on top of the drawing, in cheerfully cartoony letters, says “Toxic Masculinity Stew.”

Panel 1
A man in a chef’s shirt talks directly to the viewer. He has a mustache, is bald, and looks to be middle-aged but vigorous. He’s holding a long spoon in one hand and making a “thumb’s up” sign at the viewers with his other hand; there are various bowls arrayed in front of him, with neon green stuff in the bowls, and a big stew pot to his right. (Throughout this strip, all colors are a bit desaturated and dull, other than the neon green.)
CHEF: Welcome! Today we’ll be making “toxic masculinity stew.” Yum!

Panel 2
The chef is stirring some neon green stuff in a pan.
CHEF: We’ll start by sautéing some feelings. We’ll bury these at the bottom of the pot, so no one will ever see them!

Panel 3
The chef hold out a neon-green egg towards the viewer. The egg is visibly cracked.
CHEF: Add a delicate sense of manhood. The slightest thing can make boys feel that this has been shattered! What fun!

Panel 4
The Chef mixes something in a bowl.
CHEF: In a separate bowl, put ht eidea that “the sex” is something held by women. Mix it with the belief that if a man can’t get “the sex” from a woman, one way or the other… Then he’s not a real man at all!

Panel 5
From above the pot, we see the chef’s hand holding a shaker (like a salt shaker) and sprinkling neon green specs into the stew.
CHEF: Now sprinkle in lots of gear of being soft or gentle or vulnerable. Nothing spoils this dish quicker than boys accepting these parts of themselves!

PANEL 6
The Chef holds out a spoon towards the viewer. The spoon is dripping with a thick, neon-green liquid.
CHEF: Simmer for 10-40 years and there you have it… a lovely toxic masculinity stew! It tastes repulsive and bitter, but don’t worry. We’ll force it down.

KICKER PANEL
A tiny panel below the bottom of the strip shows a woman yelling at the cartoonist.
WOMAN: Criticizing how society harms men means you’re anti-male!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Sexism & Misogyny |

What’s The Difference?

Cartoon by Barry

Transcript of cartoon:

A woman with glasses and a slightly frightened, anxious expression is in the foreground, speaking directly to the reader.

Behind her, on the left, are three angry student protestors, yelling stuff we don’t hear. A caption identifies them as “college students.”

Also behind her, on the right, are three wealthy-looking white men in suits – one of them is President Trump – who also look angry and are yelling things we don’t hear. A caption identifies them as “governors, senators, president.”

WOMAN: Both sides have scary radicals! So what’s the difference?

This cartoon on Patreon.

Posted in Media criticism, Social Justice |

Things You Should Generally Avoid Touching

Cartoon by Barry

This cartoon was written by Rachel Swirsky. Check out Rachel’s website!

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, why not support them on Patreon? A $1 pledge matters a lot.

Transcript of cartoon.

At the top of the cartoon, the title is printed in a friendly, 1950s retro font.

TITLE: Things You Should Generally Avoid Touching

PANEL 1
This panel shows two beakers, filled with colored liquid that is bubbling away.

CAPTION: Mysterious, bubbling beakers.

PANEL 2
A Black woman with a wonderful head of hair turns back, looking annoyed, as a hand reaches out from behind her to touch her hair.

CAPTION: Strangers’ bodies.

PANEL 3
There is a sandwich; rising from the sandwich is a vaporous green death skull.

CAPTION: Sandwiches abandoned at nuclear test sites.

PANEL 4
A woman, large with pregnancy, wearing a “baby on board” tee shirt, looks down with annoyance as a hand extends out to touch her belly.

CAPTON: Strangers’ bodies.

PANEL 5
A bunch of vampire bats, including a big one in the foreground staring straight out at the viewer, mouth open to reveal fangs, are flying in the air.

CAPTION: Rabid vampire bats.

PANEL 6
We see the hips, butt and waist of a person, gender indeterminate, wearing pants with a shirt tucked in. A hand reaches out to touch their butt.

CAPTION: Seriously, strangers’ bodies.

PANEL 7
A double-wide final panel.
A white woman talks to the Black woman from panel 2. The white woman has her finger on her face as if concentrating; the Black woman looks amused.

WHITE WOMAN: What if the rabid bats attack AND I have to defeat them with the mysterious beakers but FIRST I have to get a stranger out of the way AND she can’t see or hear me… THEN can I touch her hair?

BLACK WOMAN: That sounds likely.

Posted in Racism & Racists, Sexism & Misogyny, Social Justice |

Alt Right Origins

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support my Patreon! A $1 pledge means a lot.

This cartoon has only one panel.

The panel shows an enormous, dragon-like monster – the size of a house at least – lying on the groun, looming over three reporters with microphones. The monster has a human-like, incredibly ancient face, with wrinkles upon wrinkles. The monster is labeled “racism” on his side.

The reporters give no sign of seeing the monster, Instead, they are interviewing a human-sized puppet that the monster has on its right hand. The puppet appears to be a blonde man, with the sides of his head shaved, and is wearing a white polo shirt with a swastika armband.

The puppet appears to be speaking, but the tail of the word balloon extends behind the puppet’s head and is actually coming out of the monster’s mouth.

MONSTER/PUPPET: We on the alt-right are a brand new movement, created as a response to the bullying of the intolerant left!

A REPORTER: Makes sense.
ANOTHER REPORTER: Darn those college kids!

Posted in Racism & Racists, Social Justice |

Mens Rights Activists, Feminism, and Male Workplace Deaths

Cartoon by Barry

If you like these cartoons, please help me make more, by supporting my Patreon! A $1 pledge matters a lot.

Transcript of cartoon:

PANEL 1

It’s outdoors; we can see a row of houses in the background, and some green space with trees. A woman with glasses and a yellow zip-up blouse turns, as if surprised by the man talking to her. The man has blonde hair and is wearing a yellow and orange striped shirt.

MAN: Did you know that 93% of workplace deaths happen to men? But feminists do nothing!

PANEL 2

The woman puts a finger on her chin, in a “I’m thinking” gesture. The man looks uninterested.

WOMAN: Something should be DONE! How about stronger unions, so workers could DEMAND safer workplaces?
MAN: Meh.

PANEL 3

The woman continues talking. The man turns away, looking placidly bored, his hands in his pant pockets.

WOMAN: How about strengthening OSHA, so works safety laws are actually enforced?
MAN: Whatever.

PANEL 4

The man suddenly is yelling in the woman’s face, arms wide, fists clenched, totally engaged. The woman flinches back in surprise.

WOMAN: So how do you think we should–
MAN: WRITE TEN THOUSAND TWEETS SAYING FEMINISTS SUCK!

MRAs, Feminism, and Male Workplace Deaths | Patreon

Posted in Labor rights & Unions, Sexism & Misogyny |

Suspects

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support them on Patreon! A $1 pledge matters a lot.

Transcript of cartoon

This cartoon has two panels.

PANEL 1
Two police officers are marching a prisoner into a police station. The prisoner is a white man with a huge blonde beard and messy head of hair. The two cops are speaking to a third cop, in the foreground.

COP 1: He had three guns and was screaming threats.
COP 2: It took hours, but we convinced him to surrender.
COP 3: Great job, guys!

PANEL 2
Two police officers, both looking terrified, take cover behind their car and aim their guns. They are both yelling.
COP 1: HIS HAND MOVED!
COP 2: SHOOT!

CAPTION AT BOTTOM OF THE COMIC: White suspect/Black suspect

Posted in Racism & Racists |

Minimum Evidence and the Minimum Wage

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, please support them on Patreon! Each $1 pledge matters a lot.

Transcript of cartoon
PANEL 1
The panel shows a scholarly-looking man, wearing a tie, a vest, and glasses, holding up a finger as he makes a point. He’s speaking directly to the readers.
VEST DUDE: Study after study has found that the minimum wage does not increase unemployment. But no study is 100% certain. Virtually all the empirical studies could be wrong!

PANEL 2
The man continues talking to the reader, but is interrupted by beeping from his cell phone, which he lifts to look at.
VEST GUY: We have to be cautious not to jump to any… Excuse me a moment… There’s some news.

PANEL 3
He looks at his cell phone as he speaks, grinning with delight.
VEST GUY: Wow! A new study says the minimum wage causses a big increase in unemployment! This is GREAT! … I mean….

PANEL 4
He is now yelling directly at the reader, arms waving above his head, looking righteously angered.
VEST GUY: HOW DARE THE BIASED LEFT IGNORE THIS IRONCLAD EVIDENCE?!?

KICKER PANEL
In a tiny panel below the bottom of the strip, Vest Guy is speaking to Barry Deutsch (the cartoonist).
VEST GUY: Once again, objective science PROVES whatever I want to believe!

Posted in Economic cartoons |

If Global Warming Were Real

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these comics, and you can spare it, please support them on Patreon. Even $1 matters a lot to me.

Transcript of cartoon

Panel 1
A white man wearing a collared shirt and glasses, sitting at a desk. He’s typing furiously on a laptop. In front of the desk, a dog watches him adoringly. Behind the desk, there are two windows; outside, it is dark and pouring rain, and the trees lean in the wind.

A caption tell us what he’s typing:

CAPTION: “Global warming” is FAKE NEWS! If global warming were real,

Panel 2
Glasses dude is looking out the window at the storm. Large objects – a boot, a coffee mug, a chair, a mailbox – fly by in the wind as the rain pours down.
GLASSES: Uh-oh! Not AGAIN! We’ve had so much extreme weather lately!

Panel 3
Glasses dude, now with a backpack and carrying a duffel bag, splashes through puddles as he walks away from his house, the dog following him.
GLASSES: This is AWFUL! Come along, Arf Rand!
ARF RAND: Arf!

Panel 4
A far shot of a car driving uphill through the storm. Glasses dude’s word balloon comes from the car.
GLASSES: Get upland get upland get upland get upland get upland…

Panel 5
High on a mountain, Glasses Dude has set up a tent. The sky is only partly cloudy here, and there’s no storm.
GLASSES: Phew! I think we’re safe here!
ARF RAND: Arf!

Panel 6
Glasses dude sits on the grass, next to Arf Rand, who is taking a snooze. Glasses dude is typing on his cell phone; a caption shows us what he’s typing.
CAPTION: As I was saying, if global warming WERE real, wouldn’t we see SOME sign of it?

If Global Warming Were Real… | Patreon

Posted in Barry's favorites, Environmental cartoons |

How Free Speech Was Saved

Cartoon by Barry

Transcript of Cartoon

Panel 1
This panel shows only the title of the strip, in large, cheerful letters on a blue background.
TITLE: How Free Speech Was Saved

Panel 2
Two men, in their 20s or 30s, are in a coffee shop. One of them, a handsome, muscular blonde man with a square jaw and wearing a sleeveless tee, is looking angrily at his tablet. The other, a scruffier looking man in a collared blue shirt, is sitting at a table with his laptop, but looking up in alarm.

BLONDE: The feminists are attacking free speech!
SCRUFF: Oh NO!

Panel 3
A closer shot of the two guys as they stare at Blonde’s tablet.

BLONDE: Look, this one’s calling out sexism in a video game!
SCRUFF: Feminist criticism? But that’s censorship!

Panel 4
Blonde dramatically gestures, looking up and waving fists in the air, as Scruff turns to his laptop.

BLONDE: This injustice CANNOT stand!
SCRUFF: I’ll get on social media!

Panel 5
This panel is divided into four sub-panels, showing four different men in different locations, all reading something on their computer or tablet and yelling “ATTACK!”

Panel 6
A 30ish woman in a black sleeveless tee sits in front of her laptop, a cup of coffee on the table, and looks shocked at what’s on her computer screen.
VARIOUS MESSAGES FROM COMPUTER: Step in a hole and die! Rape! I know where you live! Hate! SJW scum! You are pure @#$&! Die!
WOMAN: Yipes!

Panel 7
The same woman, now crying a little, types a message into her computer.
WOMAN: Dear friends: For the time being, I’m shutting down all my social media accounts…

Panel 8
Another panel that’s been divided into four sub-panels, each showing a different woman in a different location. They are all looking at their internet devices, and all thinking the same thought: “Look at what they did to her… Maybe I shouldn’t post online.”

Panel 9
Back to the two guys, who have their arms crossed and are looking happy and prideful, as they talk to a third man, a hippie-looking dude who is very impressed.

BLONDE: And that’s how we saved free speech!
HIPPIE: Wow! You guys are heroes!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Sexism & Misogyny |

Dear People Who Are Neither My Doctor Nor My Lover….

Cartoon by Barry

This cartoon is a collaboration with Grace Allum. Thanks, Grace!

If you enjoy these cartoons, please support them at Patreon! A pledge of a dollar or two means a lot to me.

Panel 1
(This panel is mostly a caption, in large white lettering on a dark blue background. There is a woman at the bottom of the panel, speaking directly to the reader, apparently speaking the words of the caption.)

Caption: Dear people who are neither my doctor or my lover:

Panel 2
(This panel is divided into two subpanels. In one subpanel, a woman with short hair and glasses asks a question with a cheerful attitude. In the other subpanel, a woman in a jacket and collared shirt is speaking with a concerned expression.)

Glasses: Have you had “the surgery” yet?

Jacket: When you guys went to Europe, we all figured it was for “the whole package?”

Panel 3
(There is nothing in this panel but large white letters on a dark blue background.)

Caption: I am never going…

Panel 4
(This panel is divided into two subpanels. In one subpanel, a man wearing a sweater-vest asks a question. In the other subpanel, a balding man who looks like a businessman cheerfully asks a question.)

Sweater-Vest: So did insurance cover the surgery?

Businessman: Well, your wife is postmenopausal, so she doesn’t really miss anything, right?

Panel 5
(There is nothing in this panel but large white letters on a dark blue background.)

Caption: …to tell you…

Panel 6
(This panel is divided into two subpanels. In one subpanel, a woman with tattoos gestures with her hand while asking a question. In the other subpanel, a woman in a striped shirt intertwines her fingers and cheerily asks a question.)

Tattoos: Are the nerves all right? Is everything “functioning?”

Striped Shirt: So I assume you’ve had both surgeries?

Panel 7
(There is nothing in this panel but large white letters on a dark blue background.)

Caption: …what my junk looks like.

Panel 8
(This panel is divided into two subpanels. In one subpanel, a bearded man wearing a tank top asks a question. In the other subpanel, a woman wearing a polka-dot sweater asks a question.)

Beard: Did your wife have to give permission for…you know?

Polka Dot: You’ve had the surgery, right?

Panel 9
(Final panel. The top half of this panel contains only large white letters on a dark blue background. In the bottom half of the panel, we see Sweater-Vest from Panel 4 and the woman from Panel 1 talking.)

Sweater-Vest: Then how can I know you’re really a woman?

Woman: Because I told you.

Footnote at bottom of strip: All dialog based on questions people have actually asked!

Posted in LGBT cartoons |

Ghost of Rehnquist

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, please support them on Patreon! A $1 or $2 pledge makes a big difference to me.

This cartoon was inspired by reading this Shaun King article.

Transcript

Panel 1
A young Black woman is in a park, wearing a striped sleeveless shirt and black pants, talking on her cell. She looks angry. Behind her, William Rehnquist appears with a big “Poof!” He’s wearing black judicial robes (which sort of trail off into nothing, rather than him having legs) and is smiling benevolently.
WOMAN: I can’t believe the jury let that cop off! What is it with these juries? Are they just racist?
REHNQUIST: Don’t blame the juries!

Panel 2
The woman turns around, jumping back in shock. Rehnquist continues speaking cheerfully.
WOMAN: Who are YOU?
REHNQUIST: I’m the ghost of William Rhenquist! I was Chief Justice of the Supreme Court until I died in 2005.

Panel 3
The woman listens, somewhat bewildered, as Rhenquist leans closer to explain.
REHNQUIST: When I was on the court, we ruled that it doesn’t matter if a suspect really was dangerous. If a cop says he believed the suspect was dangerous, any police shooting is legal.
(Footnote: See Tennessee v Garner & Graham v Connor.)

Panel 4
The woman calmly asks a question.
WOMAN: But doesn’t that give cops a huge incentive to say they thought hey were about to die no matter what the circumstances?
REHNQUIST: Clearly!

Panel 5
The woman now appears agitated, horrified. Rehnquist answers cheerfully, giving her a thumbs-up.
WOMAN: So even if a cop shoots a 9 year old kid, he just says he was terrified and he’s in the clear?
REHNQUIST: Now you’ve got it!

Panel 6
The woman yells angrily; Rehnquist, puzzled, shrugs.
WOMAN: So is the Supreme Court going to FIX that?
REHNQUIST: Er… Fix what?

Posted in Racism & Racists |

Trump’s Transgender Ban

Cartoon by Barry

Transcript

Panel 1
Shows Donald Trump standing on stage, at a podium.
CAPTION: Trump to Soldiers, January 20, 2017
TRUMP: “I have your back!”

Panel 2
The image shows a soldier, in US army fatigues, looking down in surprise at a knife emerging from her chest. We can see a hand with a suit sleeve the exact same color as Trump’s from panel one, coming in from the side of the panel to stab her in the back.
CAPTION: Trump to Trans Soldiers, Today

Posted in LGBT cartoons |

Questions You Probably Shouldn’t Ask A Stranger (collaboration with Rachel Swirsky)

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, please support them on Patreon. Even a $1 pledge makes a big difference to me.

Rachel Swirsky also has a Patreon! Check it out here.

Transcript of cartoon.

A BIG CAPTION AT TOP OF CARTOON says “Questions You Probably Shouldn’t Ask a Stranger.”

Panel 1
A man turns back from an ATM machine, surprised at a woman putting her hand on his shoulder.
WOMAN: How much money do you make?

Panel 2
A grocery store. A woman in the foreground examines a can of food, her back to her little son in the cart. Another woman, dressed like a movie spy (trenchcoat, dark glasses, cig dangling from lips) leans towards the toddler and whispers to him.
WOMAN: How can you know for sure your mommy loves you?

Panel 3
A public bathroom with several stalls. A woman is just emerging from a stall, and stumbles back in surprise as another woman, who bears a camera and has extremely energetic body language, approaches her, talking very cheerfully.
WOMAN: Can I take a picture of your poop?

Panel 4
A woman sits behind a table. The table has a big sign that says “Trans Student Union.” Another woman cheerfully asks her a question.
WOMAN: So, do you have a penis?

Posted in LGBT cartoons |

Seeing Global Warming

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, please help me make them by supporting my Patreon! A $1 pledge makes a big difference for me.

Transcript of Cartoon

This is a single-panel cartoon (although there’s a mini “kicker” panel in the bottom right corner). The main panel shows a comfortable-looking white man, standing on top of a cliff, facing away from the cliff’s edge. He has a huge SUV parked nearby, and in the background a factory is spewing huge clouds of smoke from smokestacks. The sky is red. Behind him, way at the bottom of the cliff, standing in five feet of water, stand four people, all looking up angrily at him. All four are non-white.

MAN: Is global warming real? I just don’t see it!

Kicker panel shows a woman who was in the water in the main panel; she’s now in front of the white man and speaking to him, with a frustrated expression. Facing her, the man folds his arm and replies cheerfully.
WOMAN: Just turn around!
MAN: I’d rather not.

Posted in Environmental cartoons |