If Taxation Really WERE Just Like Theft

Cartoon by Barry

Help me make more cartoons: Support my patreon! A $1 pledge really means a lot.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

This cartoon has six panels, with a caption underneath the bottom of the strip.

PANEL 1
Two women pull back in shock from a mugger holding a gun pointed at them. They are all on a sidewalk; there’s a cracked wall behind them, covered with graffiti. The mugger is dressed like a very stereotypical criminal: Black knit cap, dark sweatshirt, and even a domino mask.

MUGGER: Hand over your money!

PANEL 2
The mugger walks down a sidewalk, cheerfully talking to himself and holding a wad of cash. There’s some grassy hills and trees next to the sidewalk; it might be a park.

MUGGER: Phew! That was a long day of stealing! Now to go use this money!

PANEL 3
The mugger is handing a wad of cash to a workman; the workman is carrying a shovel and wearing a hardhat. They are on a city street, with a sidewalk and alleyway behind them; there are a few large potholes visible on the sidewalk. Both are smiling.

MUGGER: Here’s some money. So you’ll fill in these potholes?
WORKMAN: That’s the job!

PANEL 4
In a supermarket, a mom, pushing a nearly empty shopping cart, is talking to her son. The mugger is nearby, holding out a wad of money to her.

MOM: I don’t know how we’ll afford groceries this month, sweetie.
MUGGER: Pardon me, I’m your mugger. Here’s some money for food.

PANEL 5
The mugger and a businessman in a suit are in a boardroom type place. The mugger is leaning forward on the table to look intently at a big diagram of a missile; there’s also a stack of papers on the table next to him. The businessman is speaking, with a slightly predatory smile on his face, raising a forefinger as if making a point. Both mugger and businessman are seating in plush chairs. There’s a huge window behind them, with a view of the cityscape beyond.

BUSINESSMAN: We have drone missiles that can flatten a city block from half a world away.
MUGGER: Impressive. I’ll buy ten thousand.

PANEL 6
The mugger (still wearing his domino mask, as he has been the entire strip) is standing on A little stage platform in a park. Next to him is a man wearing a hoodie and a ski mask. Both are speaking into microphones; a little crowd is listening to them. The ski mask guy is holding out a hand dramatically; the mugger is holding a hand to his chest in an “I’m just a regular guy” sort of gesture.

SKI MASK DUDE: I’ve got the experience to be your next mugger!
MUGGER: Which mugger would you rather have a beer with? Me!

Below the entire strip is a caption. The caption says: IF TAXATION WERE JUST LIKE THEFT.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Economic cartoons |

Magic Ball

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, please support my patreon! A $1 pledge really means a lot.

Transcript of Cartoon

This cartoon has four panels, and is colored in various tones of sepia.

Panel 1

A man stands alone in a room, holding out a shiny ball in one hand. He is speaking to the ball. Nearby, an open box with “Magic Ball” written on it lies open on the floor. The man is looking a little anxious, and is dressed in a slightly old-fashioned style, with a bow tie and a vest with thin vertical stripes.

MAN: Oh, magic ball… I wish I lived in the old days. Society was better then. Life was better.

MAGIC BALL: I, the Magic Ball, will grant your wish!

Panel 2

The man continues speaking to the magic ball, now with an overjoyed expression.

MAN: Wow, it works! Thank you, magic ball! It’s been my lifelong dream to live back when everything was civilized!

MAGIC BALL: I’ll send you to any century you wish! But choose carefully, because when you get there, you’ll be Black.

Panel 3

Still holding the ball, the man looks up as he concentrates, his brow knitted.

MAN: In that case, I’ll go to… Please send me to… To…

Panel 4

Dejected, the man walks away, tossing the ball away over one shoulder.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists |

How The Climate Change Hoax Works

Cartoon by Barry

If you like these cartoons, please support my Patreon! A $1 pledge helps keep me drawing cartoons.

I drew this one back in June, but as far as I can tell, I never got around to posting it on Leftycartoons until now.

Transcript of Cartoon

This cartoon has four panels.

PANEL 1

Two scientists are talking. We can tell that they’re scientists because they’re wearing lab coats and there’s sciency-looking equipment in the background. Also a reel-to-reel projector and a photo of Al Gore. The Young Scientist is talking animatedly to the Older Scientist; Young’s eyes are wide and naive.

YOUNG: Doctor Goldberg, I know it’s my first day on the job, but I found data proving that global warming is a hoax!

PANEL 2

Older Scientist holds a hand high in the air, gesturing towards a brighter future. Young Scientist turns away, looking up in a noble fashion, his left fist clasped over his heart.

OLDER: It’s true, we made it all up! But play along and you’ll be rich!
YOUNG: Never! The people have a right to the truth!

PANEL 3

OLDER has produced a handgun and shoots YOUNG in the back; YOUNG is in great pain and looks like he’s about to fall over.

OLDER: What a shame.
YOUNG: AAAGH! I die and the spirit of science dies with me!

PANEL 4

Two completely different characters, a man and a woman, in a completely different scene. (We know it’s different because there’s no longer science stuff in the background, and because the color scheme has changed). The man is telling a story.

MAN: …So that’s what I think happens.
WOMAN: It does sound more likely than global warming being true.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Environmental cartoons |

Forced Kidney Donation

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, help me make more by supporting my Patreon! A $1 pledge really helps.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

This cartoon has seven panels, arranged in a grid of six small panels (three across, two down), followed by a final panel which is quite large.

Panels 1-6 are colored in a minimalist color scheme featuring shades of brown and yellow.

PANEL 1

Panel 1 shows a close-up of man with a van dyke beard with his head on a pillow, snoring. A voice speaks from off-panel.

MAN: Zzzzz…
OFF PANEL VOICE: Wake him up.

PANEL 2

Panels 2 and 3 have a continuous background, showing a bedroom. In panel 2, Man is still asleep in bed, but a man in a solider-or-guard-like uniform is standing over him, with a hand on his shoulder.

SOLDIER: Get up! You’re going to the hospital!

PANEL 3

The man is now out of bed, with another soldier handcuffing him. The man is dressed only in a tee shirt and underwear. In front of him, a middle-aged woman, wearing a jacket and skirt, with a bun and a clipboard, is addressing him.

MAN: What’s HAPPENING?
CLIPBOARD: We’re taking your kidney.

PANEL 4

A close-up of Man and Clipboard. Man is wide-eyed with shock and fear; Clipboard is officious.

MAN: What? WHY?
CLIPBOARD: Your son is ill. He needs your kidney to live.

PANEL 5

We’ve changed locations; Man is now strapped won to an operating table. His tee-shirt is gone, and he’s yelling, futility. Two people in surgical gowns, gloves and masks – one of whom is Clipboard – stand over him. Clipboard is pointing to something on her clipboard.

MAN: But I don’t HAVE a son!
CLIPBOARD: You do. He’s from a one-night stand 20 years ago.

PANEL 6

No dialog in this panel. We see Man’s terrified face and, in the foreground, a gloved hand holding a scalpel.

The bottom border of the above six panels forms a word balloon, which is pointing to MAN in panel 7, indicating that the first six panels are a story that Man is telling in panel 7.

PANEL 7

The same man from the first six panels. He is now standing in a parking lot in front of a building, cheerfully telling a story to another man. Man and his friend are both holding signs that say “PRO LIFE” in big letters. They are surrounded by at least five other protesters, both men and women, also holding “PRO LIFE” signs.

Unlike the first six panels, this panel is in full color.

MAN: And that’s when I woke up. Thank goodness it was only a terrible nightmare!

Posted in Abortion, Barry's favorites, Sexism & Misogyny |

Walter, The Guy Who Thinks Nothing’s Changed Since 1860

Cartoon by Barry

If you like these cartoons, please help me make more by supporting my Patreon. A $1 pledge means a lot to me!

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

This cartoon has four panels.

PANEL 1
This panel is mostly the title of the cartoon: “WALTER, THE GUY WHO THINKS NOTHING’S CHANGED SINCE 1860!”
The title is in large, cartoon-style lettering.
At the bottom of the panel we see Walter, a man with black sideburns and a black top hat, wearing an 1860s style suit.
WALTER: What’s a “phone”?

PANEL 2
Walter and a woman are on a sidewalk. The woman is walking towards a car that’s parked nearby. Walter is pointing at her and laughing as she looks back in annoyance.
WALTER: How will you move this carriage without any horses? HA!

PANEL 3
Walter is walking down a grassy hillside, talking at two women who are walking away from him and trying to ignore him. One of the women is rolling her eyes. Both women are wearing pants.
WALTER: A train that goes from coast to coast? HA! What a fairy tale!
WALTER: Kansas isn’t a state!
WALTER: Why are ladies wearing trousers?

PANEL 4
Walter, smiling, is inside a house (or some sort of building, anyway, talking to an annoyed-looking Black man with glasses and a goatee.
WALTER: You can’t call Republicans racist when it’s the Democrats who support slavery! HA!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists |

Doctors and Fat Patients

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, you can help me make more by supporting my Patreon. A $1 pledge really helps!

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON
This cartoon has four panels.

PANEL 1
The panel shows a doctor, with thick-framed glasses, neat shoulder-length white hair, and holding a clipboard, in an examining room talking to a patient. The patient is wearing striped pants and a square-collar short sleeved blouse, and has her dark hair in a bun. The patient is sitting on one of those patient examination tables they have in doctors’ offices.

The patient is using her right hand to hold out her left arm, which is not connected to her body, to show it to the doctor.

Important: The doctor is thin, the patient is fat.

The doctor is calm; the patient is also calm, but also concerned.

DOCTOR: Hi, I’m doctor Douglas. What seems to be the problem?
PATIENT: I woke up this morning and my arm had fallen off.

PANEL 2
The doctor, still speaking calmly, is looking down at the patient’s body. The patient, still holding her detached left arm in her right hand, looks a bit annoyed.

DOCTOR: Hmmmm…. First thing, let’s get you on a diet.
PATIENT: A diet? To reconnect my arm?

PANEL 3
A shot from behind the doctor, looking over the doctor’s shoulder at the patient. The patient is now quite angry, raising her voice.

DOCTOR: Your weight is the real issue here… How many times a day do you eat fast food?
PATIENT: I’M HERE ABOUT MY ARM!

PANEL 4
The doctor, now alone, sits at a desk in an office (desk lamp, degree on wall, books on a shelf). The doctor is typing on a laptop, and looks peeved. Above her, we see words in the air showing what she’s typing.

DOCTOR (writing on laptop): “Patient was uncooperative…”

Posted in Barry's favorites, Fat Acceptance, Health care, Social Justice |

Why Didn’t She?

Cartoon by Barry

I couldn’t make these cartoons without people supporting my Patreon! A $1 pledge really matters.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

This cartoon has only one panel. The panel shows a crowd of people, looking down on them from above. A dark-haired woman in the middle of the crowd, wearing a red blouse and a blue skirt, looks frightened. Everyone else in the crowd is yelling at her, pointing at her, shaking fists at her, etc – it is not a friendly crowd.

A little removed from the mob, at the bottom of the cartoon, a blonde man wearing a blue turtleneck talks to a black-haired woman, raising his hands in a shrugging gesture.

MAN: If she was raped, why didn’t she say so sooner?

Posted in Barry's favorites, Sexism & Misogyny |

Checking The News

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, please help me make more by supporting my Patreon. A $1 pledge really matters!

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

This cartoon has four panels.

PANEL 1

A woman with glasses and dark, shortish hair, sits at a desk, an open laptop on the desk in front of her. She’s turned her head away from the laptop, and is responding to an off-panel voice.

OFF-PANEL VOICE: What’s going on in the world?
WOMAN: I’ll check the news.

PANEL 2

The woman checks her laptop.

PANEL 3

An enormous, violent blast of bright force shoots out of her laptop screen, pushing her so hard her hair streams out behind her.

PANEL 4

The woman again turns back to speak to the off-panel voice, but her head is now just a skull, still smoking from the blast.

OFF-PANEL VOICE: Anything going on?
WOMAN: The usual.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Media criticism |

The Brave Truth-Teller

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please help me make more by supporting my Patreon. A $1 pledge really matters.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

PANEL 1
A white man with an exaggerated “fashy” haircut – shaved close on the sides, longer and neatly combed on top – stands on top of a hill, one hand raised, declaiming. He’s wearing a blue polo shirt. Cumulus clouds cross the sky behind him. He is speaking loudly with a stern expression.

BTT: I am the Brave Truth-Teller!
BTT: I speak the truths that ordinary people are too cowed to say!
BTT: Come hear my incredible courage!

PANEL 2
The same scene, but the “camera” has backed up a bit, and in the foreground a couple more white people – a man and a woman – are looking at the Brave Truth-Teller in delighted surprise. Waaay in the background, we can see a tiny figure on a distant hill, who also seems to be declaiming.

BTT: I’m the only one who dares to say:
BTT: I will not used your “preferred pronoun!”
BTT: Men are the real victims of sexism!
BTT: Whites are the real victims of racism!
BTT: Fat people are objectively gross!
MAN: Gasp! That man! He’s speaking the truth!
WOMAN: Is that allowed? He is so BRAVE!

PANEL 3
The “camera” is now straight above the Brave Truth-Teller, pointing down at him as he goes on. He is now surrounded by a big crowd of smiling admirers. They seem to be almost all white people.

BTT: Hitler was a lefty!
BTT: Liberals are totalitarians!
SOMEONE IN CROWD: Brave Truth-Teller! May I put you on TV?
SOMEONE IN CROWD: May I give you a million dollars?
SOMEONE IN CROWD: May I give you a book contract?
SOMEONE IN CROWD: May I have sex with you?
SOMEONE IN CROWD: Me too!
SOMEONE IN CROWD: You should run for office!

Instead of having a bottom panel border, panel 3 turns into a thought balloon at the bottom. The thought balloon leads to…

PANEL 4
The Brave Truth-Teller is sitting in an ordinary looking home. He’s in a plaid armchair, with a laptop on his lap. There’s a non-matching ottoman in front of the chair. Next to the chair is a little round table holding a lamp, a coffee mug, a pencil, and an open copy of “12 Rules For Life” by Jordan Peterson. His sneakers lie on the floor nearby. There’s a window, through which we can see a bush and a tree outside, and a dresser with some books on top and a half-open drawer. The colors in this panel are a bit more naturalistic than in the previous panels.

The previous panel’s art is in a thought balloon, leading to the BTT’s head.

BTT (thought): Someday…

SMALL KICKER PANEL UNDER THE CARTOON
The BTT, smiling, is speaking with Barry the Cartoonist, who isn’t smiling.

BTT: Until then, I’ve got my own youtube channel.
BARRY: Of course you do.

Posted in Barry's favorites |

I Have Been Silenced!

Cartoon by Barry

If you like these cartoons, you can help me make more by supporting my Patreon! I’m trying to build a living on $1 pledges from a lot of readers, and it’s slowly working.

Transcript

This cartoon has four panels, plus a small “kicker” panel beneath the bottom of the cartoon.

PANEL 1
An older man wearing glasses, sitting behind a desk, is talking to an intense man with a large black beard and wearing a suit jacket but no tie. We’ll call him “Blackbeard.”
GLASSES: We’re dropping your column. Many readers think you’re just too extreme.
BLACKBEARD: I have been silenced!

PANEL 2
Blackbeard is standing on stage behind a lectern, holding a hand high in the air as he declames. There’s a huge audience listening to him.
BLACKBEARD: I have been silenced!

PANEL 3
A newspaper lies on a table, near a coffee mug and a spoon. The newspaper is The Washington Post. A front page story shows a photo of Blackbeard talking, and a headline that says “I Have Been Silenced!”

PANEL 4
We are looking at a flatscreen TV. The TV shows Blackbeard appearing on Fox News. Blackbeard is yelling. An off-camera interviewer speaks.
INTERVIEWER: …here with his new book, “I have been silenced.”
BLACKBEARD: I have been silenced!

KICKER PANEL BELOW BOTTOM OF STRIP
Barry the cartoonist is talking to Blackbeard.
BARRY: It seems–
BLACKBEARD: STOP SILENCING ME!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Media criticism |

Words White People Hate (aka Words, Words, Words)

Cartoon by Barry

I couldn’t make these cartoons without my supporters on Patreon! A $1 pledge matters a lot to me.

Transcript of Cartoon

This panel has four panels, plus a tiny “kicker” panel below the bottom of the cartoon. Each panel shows a Black woman wearing Saddle Oxford shoes is talking to a white woman with glasses and a pony tail.

PANEL 1
Saddle Shoes is leaning forward to explain something; Glasses rubs her chin thoughtfully and looks up into the air.
SADDLE SHOES: What we need to understand about white fragility is-
GLASSES: The phrase “white fragility” sounds racist to me.

PANEL 2
Saddle Shoes makes a conciliatory gesture, palms up; Glasses makes a “stop!” gesture with both hands, looking testy.
SADDLE SHOES: Sure, whatever.What we need to understand about white privilege is-
GLASSES: I don’t like that term, “white privilege.” Can’t we just say “racism” instead?

PANEL 3
Saddle Shoes, now looking testy herself, keeps trying to explain. Glasses looks angry, her hands on her hips.
SADDLE SHOES: Ooo-kay. What we need to understand about racism is-
GLASSES: The word “racism” is bullying and shuts down conversation!

PANEL 4
Saddle shoes looks annoyed, folding her arms. Glasses looks very pleased, opening her arms in a welcoming gesture.
SADDLE SHOES: I’m getting the impression you’d rather NOT have this conversation.
GLASSES: What a great idea! Let’s do that.

“KICKER” PANEL
The same pair of women. The woman with glasses is talking angrily.
GLASSES: Talking about things I disagree with is divisive!

This cartoon on Patreon.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists |

Civility Zombies

Cartoon by Barry

If you can spare it, please help me keep making these cartoons! A $1 pledge really matters.

Gretchen Koch and I were chatting on Twitter, about if I should do a cartoon about the “civility” issue. Gretchen said “I think it’s worth it, because as you said, it’s perennial. The civility zombie, that is.” This comic strip immediately popped into my mind, and fortunately for me, Gretchen said she didn’t mind if I used the idea. Thanks, Gretchen!

Also, thanks to Mandolin for suggesting the kicker panel!

Drawing cute cartoon zombies is, as it turns out, a great deal of fun.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

This is a four-panel cartoon.

PANEL 1

Two women, one with a ponytail, one with glasses, are in a house, near an open window. The woman with glasses looks angry and is holding a cell phone; the woman with the ponytail is reacting with panic.

GLASSES: Have you read the news? $@@! the GOP!
PONYTAIL: Shh! Don’t say that!
DISTANT VOICE FROM OUTSIDE WINDOW: Civility.
(Note: Here and throughout the cartoon, the word “civility” is lettered in fonts designed to look like dripping blood.)

PANEL 2

Zombies appear in the window, looking like they might crawl into the house. They have rotting green flesh and each of them is raising a forefinger and waggling it.

GLASSES: What’s happening?
PONYTAIL: It’s the civility zombies! They come whenever someone on the left is impolite! RUN!
ZOMBIES: Civility! Civility…

PANEL 3

Glasses and Ponytail flee up a hillside, pursued by zombies. A zombie in the foreground look sstraight at the viewer.

GLASSES: Can we shoot them?
PONYTAIL: That’s rude, which only makes them stronger! Plus, we’re liberals! We don’t have guns!
ZOMBIES: Civility! Civility! Civility!

PANEL 4

Glasses and Ponytail have come to a stop, surrounded by zombies. Glasses looks frightened; Ponytail looks irritated.

ZOMBIES: Civility! Civility!
GLASSES: So this is it? We’re going to die?
PONYTAIL: No, they’re completely toothless. But so annoying!

SMALL KICKER PANEL BELOW BOTTOM OF STRIP

A man in a “MAGA” hat is grinning and talking at a zombie. The zombie has his back to the MAGA hat wearer, and makes a dismissive gesture with his hand.

MAGA: Libtards! Cucks! Snowflakes!
ZOMBIE (in blood-dripping lettering): Meh.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Media criticism |

Top Ten Reasons We Take Kids From Their Parents At The Border

Cartoon by Barry

I couldn’t make these cartoons without the support people give me on Patreon! If you can spare it, a $1 pledge really matters to me.

Here’s a list of organizations that are mobilizing to help separated immigrant children | The Texas Tribune

Transcript of cartoon:

This cartoon has a title panel followed by ten panels.

TITLE PANEL
CAPTION: Top Ten Reasons We Take Kids From Their Parents At The Border

Below the title, a caricature of Jeff Sessions is speaking to the viewer, smiling.
SESSIONS: Refugees are fleeing despots and murderers! So to deter refugees, we have to be even worse!

PANEL 1

A cheerful man in an ICE uniform speaks directly to the viewer. Behind him is a cage filled with wide-eyed children.
MAN: How else can we test our awesome child-holding cages?

PANEL 2
A well-off (or at least, middle class) looking couple sits at a table; the man looks down, ashamed, while the woman talks with wide-eyed sincerity at the viewer.
MAN: Because I’m tired of caring about what happens to other people.
WOMAN: It’s exhausting.

PANEL 3
A hand holds a smartphone. On the phone, a video on Youtube or some similar site is playing, showing a young man wearing a hoodie sitting in his car and talking to the camera. He’s grinning hugely.
MAN: Because it’s worth it to see the snowflakes cry!

PANEL 4
A middle-aged man in an ICE uniform, with a big cop mustache, holds an adorable smiling baby towards the viewers. The baby is wearing footie pajamas with a pattern of little hearts. The man is yelling angrily.
MAN: Because this is the face of a TERRORIST!

PANEL 5
A man in a hoodie is curled up in the corner of an empty room; he’s very small. He’s hugging himself with one arm while sweating with fear. His word balloon and lettering are shaky.
MAN: Brown illegals are coming to steal my way of life.

PANEL 6
A woman wearing sunglasses and a MAGA hat speaks directly to the viewers, looking stern, calm, and collected. Behind her is a fence with barbed wire on top; on the other side of the fence are people in silhouette.
WOMAN: This is what making America great looks like.

PANEL 7
An ICE agent speaks cheerfully to the viewers, while he’s holding a woman in a very painful looking headlock.
ICE AGENT: Because we can do anything we like to illegals! It’s not like they’re people.

PANEL 8
We are looking at a wall of an institutional looking building made of concrete blocks. A sign on the building says “Detention Facility.” A door into the building has a window embedded in it. Through the window, we can see the face of an angry looking man, talking to us.
MAN: Because we’re throwing the kids a big party! With clowns! And balloons! No, you CAN’T see!

PANEL 9
A person wearing a KKK outfit, white hood and all, stands in front of a barbed wire fence. Dark stormclouds can be seen behind the KKK member.
KKK: Isn’t it obvious?

PANEL 10
Uncle Sam, wearing the top hat and also a Hawaiian shirt with flowers all over it, sneers at the viewer as he gives the viewer the finger.
UNCLE SAM: Because fuck you! THAT’S why.

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists, Social Justice |

But she never said “no”!

Cartoon by Barry

This stip was created with Becky Hawkins, who is also my collaborator on SuperButch! Becky drew this comic, while I wrote, lettered, and added the colors.

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support them on Patreon! A $1 pledge really matters to me.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

The title image of this cartoon has the words “But she never said ‘NO’ in large white letters that fade into the background. Below the title is a drawing of telephone wires, with two birds sitting on a wire.
FIRST BIRD: Does this comic strip need a content warning?
SECOND BIRD: I think the title covers it.

PANEL 1

A woman and a man are on a sofa. The man is leaning towards her, putting his lips near hers, while she pulls back and puts a protective hand, in a “stop” gesture, in front of her mouth.

WOMAN: I’m not sure I want to do this right now…
MAN (thought): That’s not literally saying “no.”

PANEL 2
A closer shot of him from over the woman’s shoulder. He is smiling. She’s still holding up a “stop” hand. His thought balloon partly obscures her speech balloon, but not so much that we can’t read what she’s saying.

WOMAN: Hey c’mon, this isn’t a good idea.
MAN (thought): That’s not a literal “no.” So it’s okay to grab her boobs.

PANEL 3
A closer shot of him leaning in to kiss her as she pulls away. She’s saying something, but we can’t read it because his thought balloon gets in the way.

MAN (thought): She still hasn’t literally said “no.” I’m good!

PANEL 4
A close-up of his face. The woman’s not in the panel, but her word balloon – still mostly obscured by his head and his thought balloon – indicates that she’s positioned below him. He looks like he’s concentrating.

MAN (thought): Pulling away while I’m trying to pull her pants down isn’t literally saying “no.”

PANEL 5
In silhouette, we see that she’s lying on her back, with him on top of her. She isn’t saying anything.

MAN (thought): Now she’s just being silent and unresponsive. No talking means she’s not saying “no!”

PANEL 6
This is the final panel. The setting has changed; the man is now holding his arms up and looking frustrated. A few people in silhouette are looking at him; their posture makes it seem like they’re angry at him.

MAN: How was I supposed to know? I’m not a mind-reader!

KICKER PANEL

A small panel below the bottom of the strip shows the man, now looking full of himself, talking to a different couple of people.

MAN: I do consider myself a feminist!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Becky Hawkins collaborations, Sexism & Misogyny |

How Long? aka Trump Card

Cartoon by Barry

If you can spare it, please support these cartoons at Patreon. A $1 pledge really matters.

TRANSCRIPT OF CARTOON

There are four panels in this cartoon.

The first three panels show two women walking on a hillside, perhaps in a park. One woman is wearing a shirt with an exclamation mark design, the other is wearing glasses. They’re arguing.

PANEL 1

EXCLAMATION MARK: A lot of liberals are rigid and mean to people who disagree with them.
GLASSES: Conservatives elected Donald Trump president.

PANEL 2

EXCLAMATION MARK: Obamacare didn’t deliver nearly as much as liberals promised!
GLASSES: Yeah, but conservatives elected Trump!

PANEL 3
Exclamation Mark has turned her back on Glasses, crossing her arms and looking stubborn.

EXCLAMATION MARK: Oh, come on! How long are you going to hold that against us.

PANEL 4

We are in outer space; there’s a moon nearby, and a flying saucer and planet in the background. In the foreground, two brains in high-tech-looking jars (well, “high-tech” in a 1950s sci-fi movie prop sort of way), both with eyeballs, are floating in space. One of the brains is wearing a pair of glasses.

CAPTION: A million billion years later.
GLASSES: …but conservatives elected Trump!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Elections |

Why Some Jobs Are Illegal

Cartoon by Barry

I couldn’t do all these cartoons without the support I get on Patreon. A $1 pledge really matters.

Sex work is, for me, in the same category as smoking pot or (until recently) not legally recognizing same-sex marriages, a category I’d describe as “there’s just no logical reason this should be illegal.”

This cartoon focuses on how little sense the arguments against legalization make. But the most important line, for me, is in panel 2: “Wouldn’t that make things worse for maids?” It seems clear that 1) no law will ever succeed in wiping out sex work, and 2) laws making sex work illegal inevitably hurt the sex workers themselves.

When the government outlaws something, it’s going to lead to people being hurt.

And sometimes it’s worth it. Lowering the speed limit to 20mph in a residential zone will harm some people. Some people will be made late, some people will have to pay speeding tickets, etc. But in exchange for that, we get a big gain – pedestrians hit by cars will have a much higher chance of surviving. The gain, in this case, seems worth the loss.

But outlawing selling sex makes it much more likely that sex workers will be assaulted, hurt, even killed, and makes it much harder for them to go to police for help. And the more marginalized a sex worker is (for instance, because of race, or because of being trans) the more endangered they are. This doesn’t seem to be a case where the gains justify the losses.

Artwise, this strip looks good to me, although I wish I had inked with bigger, meatier lines – the lines in this one look a bit too thin and controlled to my eyes. But that’s the sort of thing I notice a lot more than readers do, I think.

There are a bunch of things I think came out well. The clothing is better than usual for me this strip. The hardest thing to draw here was the maid’s cart, but I think it came out well (by which I mean, I think readers will immediately recognize what it is without having to think about it). And I think some of the body language looks good (especially the woman in the plaid shirt in panels 3 and 4).

Transcript of cartoon

Panel 1
In the foreground, a young woman with her head shaved on the sides and sunglasses is walking three dogs. In the background, standing on a grassy hillside, two women, one in a polo shirt, the other in a plaid shirt, are talking.
POLO: No one could want to be a dog-walker. It shouldn’t be legal.
PLAID: Some people like it.

Panel 2
In a hotel hallway, in the foreground, a maid pushes a cleaning cart. In the background, the same two women are talking.
POLO: Many maids are exploited or even trafficked. We should outlaw being a maid!
PLAID: Wouldn’t that make things worse for maids?

Panel 3
A hilly park again. In the foreground, a man with a knit cap and one of those orange “I work for the city” vests is picking up trash off the ground with a trash-picking stick. In the background, the same two women talk; Polo looks disgusted, and Plaid is facepalming.
POLO: Picking up trash for a living is gross. It shouldn’t be allowed.
PLAID: You’re being ridiculous.

Panel 4
In the final panel, we see only Polo and Plaid, talking to each other. Polo has a forefinger pointing up, making a point, and Plaid responds fervently, leaning forward and smacking her fist into the palm of her other hand.
POLO: And for the exact same reasons, we should outlaw prostitution!
PLAID: YES!

This cartoon on Patreon

Posted in Barry's favorites, Labor rights & Unions |

Too Much Foam

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support my Patreon!

Panel one shows a woman in a polka-dot dress sitting in a coffee shop, glaring down at her cappuccino.

WOMAN (thought): Aw, darn it. They put too much foam on my cappuccino!

Panel 2 shows a bald man in the foreground, sitting at a different table, reading something on his smartphone. He is sitting on a power chair, and he has no right arm. There’s a cappuccino in front of him. In the background, we can see the woman from panel one, staring at the bald man with a shocked expression.

WOMAN (thought): Oh wow – that guy has no legs and only one arm! How does he even get out of bed in the morning?

Panel 3 shows the woman, head in hands, looking aghast.

WOMAN (thought): He has to psend every minute of his life figuring out how to manage with just one arm… and I’m thinking about foam! I SUCK!

Panel 4 shows the bald man again. He has picked up his cappuccino and is looking annoyed.

MAN (thought): They put too much foam on my cappuccino!

Posted in Ableism, Barry's favorites |

The Life of MLK Jr (as told by white people)

Cartoon by Barry

This cartoon was posted today on The Nib.

If you enjoy my cartoons, and can spare it, please support them on Patreon! A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon:

PANEL 1
A Black woman sits in an armchair, holding a little baby. The baby is crying.
CAPTION: MLK Jr was born.

PANEL 2
A young Black boy sits up in bed, in a dark bedroom, clutching his blanket.
CAPTION: Then he had a dream.
BOY: I had a dream that someday our children would be judged by the content of their character, not the color of their skin! So stop playing the race card!
OFF-PANEL VOICE: Martin, go to sleep!

PANEL 3
Panel three shows a graveyard, The gravestone in the foregound has, carved on it, “Martin Luther King Junior. “Stop Playing The Race Card.”
CAPTION: And he NEVER said or did anything else EVER. And then he died. The end!

CAPTION AT BOTTOM OF STRIP: THE LIFE OF MLK JR (AS TOLD BY WHITE PEOPLE)

The Life of MLK Jr (as told by white people) | Barry Deutsch on Patreon

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists |

White Lies (a sequel)

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy these cartoons, and can spare it, please support them at Patreon. A $1 pledge means a lot.

This cartoon is actually a sequel, to this other cartoon I did at least a decade ago. It’s interesting (to me, at least) seeing how my style has changed over the years.

Transcript of Cartoon

TITLE PANEL
Fractured-looking letters say “White Lies.” Next to the lettering, a smiling white lady speaks directly to the viewer.
LADY: I don’t even see race!

PANEL 1
A smiling white man explains himself.
MAN: I was only being FUNNY! I mean, “ironic.”

PANEL 2
A white man stands holding a black woman in front of him. To his left, a white woman stands, hugging a little Asian boy, and holding an Asian baby with her other arm. The boy has an image of Captain America’s iconic shield on his t-shirt.
WHITE MAN: I have a Black wife!
WHITE WOMAN: I adopted Asian kids!
BOTH TOGETHER: So nothing we say could possibly be racist!

PANEL 3
A young white man types at a laptop, his coffee cop besides him. Above him, we can see what he’s typing – a social media comment, with “his” picture, showing a pretty Black woman, besides the comment.
He is typing: As a strong Black woman, I think we Blacks talk too much about racism.

PANEL 4
An angry white woman, standing near a fence with some giant sunflowers nearby, talks directly to the viewer.
WOMANL Only monsters are racist! So criticizing me for racism is calling me a monster! How dare you call me a monster? So uncivil!

PANEL 5
A young white woman, stands in a coffee shop, holding a cup of tea and a saucer.
WOMAN: I DEFINITELY have a non-white friend who agrees with me.

PANEL 6
A white woman in slacks and a polo shirt sits on a park bench, reading a newspaper (“Daily Opiate”) and speaking cheerfully to the viewer.
WOMAN: My vote for Trump had nothing to do with racism!

PANEL 7
An older white man, with a friendly demeanor, a big white beard, and a sweater vest, speaks to the viewer.
MAN: I can’t be a racist, because I voted for Obama.

PANEL 8
Two white people stand talking directly to the viewer: A man with a checkerboard shirt, and a woman wearing a sleeveless black shirt. The man, spreading his arms wide, has a angry expression; the woman is holding up one finger like a professor making a point.
MAN: When non-whites get ANGRY discussing racism, that proves they’re irrational!
WOMAN: And when whites speak calmly, that proves our opinions are super rational!

PANEL 9
A white woman stands on a golf course, holding a golf club across one shoulder. She looks anxious.
WOMAN: If “Black Lives Matter,” that means white lives don’t matter!

PANEL 10
An angry white man is yelling and pointing at a Black woman.
MAN: The word “racism” is unfair because it shuts white people up!
WOMAN (thought): If only…

KICKER PANEL
In a small panel below the bottom of the comic strip, an angry white woman speaks directly to the viewers.
WOMAN: This cartoon generalizes about white people! That makes IT the REAL racist!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Racism & Racists |

Toxic Masculinity Stew

Cartoon by Barry

If you enjoy my cartoons, and can spare it, please support my patreon! A $1 pledge means a lot.

Transcript of cartoon

At the top of the strip, there’s a drawing of various unidentifiable shapes floating in a liquid in a pot. Lettering on top of the drawing, in cheerfully cartoony letters, says “Toxic Masculinity Stew.”

Panel 1
A man in a chef’s shirt talks directly to the viewer. He has a mustache, is bald, and looks to be middle-aged but vigorous. He’s holding a long spoon in one hand and making a “thumb’s up” sign at the viewers with his other hand; there are various bowls arrayed in front of him, with neon green stuff in the bowls, and a big stew pot to his right. (Throughout this strip, all colors are a bit desaturated and dull, other than the neon green.)
CHEF: Welcome! Today we’ll be making “toxic masculinity stew.” Yum!

Panel 2
The chef is stirring some neon green stuff in a pan.
CHEF: We’ll start by sautéing some feelings. We’ll bury these at the bottom of the pot, so no one will ever see them!

Panel 3
The chef hold out a neon-green egg towards the viewer. The egg is visibly cracked.
CHEF: Add a delicate sense of manhood. The slightest thing can make boys feel that this has been shattered! What fun!

Panel 4
The Chef mixes something in a bowl.
CHEF: In a separate bowl, put ht eidea that “the sex” is something held by women. Mix it with the belief that if a man can’t get “the sex” from a woman, one way or the other… Then he’s not a real man at all!

Panel 5
From above the pot, we see the chef’s hand holding a shaker (like a salt shaker) and sprinkling neon green specs into the stew.
CHEF: Now sprinkle in lots of gear of being soft or gentle or vulnerable. Nothing spoils this dish quicker than boys accepting these parts of themselves!

PANEL 6
The Chef holds out a spoon towards the viewer. The spoon is dripping with a thick, neon-green liquid.
CHEF: Simmer for 10-40 years and there you have it… a lovely toxic masculinity stew! It tastes repulsive and bitter, but don’t worry. We’ll force it down.

KICKER PANEL
A tiny panel below the bottom of the strip shows a woman yelling at the cartoonist.
WOMAN: Criticizing how society harms men means you’re anti-male!

Posted in Barry's favorites, Sexism & Misogyny |